Category: Limericks

There was a Paleontologist who dined on scrod.

For his contributions to science let us applaud.

His research was focused on fossilized feces.

It was thus he discovered a new sub-species. 

The timid, plant eating, Prosauropod. 

There was an old farmer, John Spears.  

An NCAA Basketball fan for 65 years. 

Who are the best players you’ve seen?

Who is your favorite basketball team?

Said John, “Indiana, whose yers?”

There was a middle-aged Moose in Texarkana. 

Not one for a handkerchief, but wore a bandana. 

Didn’t want to haggle price on a new car,

Besides the dealership was too far. 

He chose home delivery from Carvana. 

There was an electrical engineer, really bright. 

Developed a gizmo to aid vision at night. 

Translucent, in the shape of a bud vase. 

With inert chemicals in an H2O base.

The user just adds an electro-light.

There once was a Moose from Bozeman. 

Applied to the volunteer fire brigade, they chose him.

He can’t climb a latter.

Oh, that’s no lofty matter. 

He’s the #2 hose-man. 

There once was a Moose from Dundee.

Didn’t like snow, loved to water ski.

With a refined and vast repertoire,

He performed at shows near and far.

In his day, a child prodigy. 

There once was a Moose from Cheyenne.

Prepared quick grits in a frying pan.

The method was simple and easy.

Produced a fare most cheesy.

Topped with a pinch of cayenne.

There once was a Moose from Waterloo.

For an appetizer, preferred Kentucky burgoo.

Never ordered hors d’oeuvres.

Would eat one of yours.

His entree, Mulligan stew. 

Our Irish Setter prefers marinara on rotini,

With sautéed yellow squash and zucchini. 

Our Persian cat, on the other hand, 

is finicky and will demand,  

There be Alfredo on the Fettuccine!