Category: Limericks

Our Irish Setter prefers marinara on rotini,

With sautéed yellow squash and zucchini. 

Our Persian cat, on the other hand, 

is finicky and will demand,  

There be Alfredo on the Fettuccine! 

There was a lad from West Lout.

Mother made him keep his shoes out. 

“On your feet they’ll drag dirt in.

I’ll have to clean all over again.”

Won’t I eventually drag the dirt out?

The heart transplant went flawlessly, you would have guessed. 

The surgeon’s work left many very impressed. 

For the patient’s part, 

He had a change of heart.

But came in for an X-ray of his chest. 

Developed a tire with stainless steel tread. 

Available in colors blue, green or red. 

High marks for customer satisfaction.

Really slick when it comes to traction.

 They’ll look great in any flowerbed. 

Twas an entrepreneur from Anchor Bay.

Desired a high I.B.U. in his IPA. 

He spared no expense I must confide, 

Negotiating price on the higher side.  

To the chagrin of his CPA.

There was a car owner on Oak Street. 

Wanted a car cleaned meticulously, complete.

When finished with their gyrations,

The experts exceeded expectations. 

Providing a detailed receipt. 

There was a man from Ho Chi Minh City. 

Thought the name of the place was a pity. 

Let bygones be bygones.

Let Ho Chi Minh City be Saigon. 

A song by any other name is a ditty. 

There was a young man from Decker.

In desperate need of a phishing checker. 

He went about his way,

With caution every day, 

Using Clouseau as an email inspector. 

The other day occurred an event most surprising. 

I’ll give some details ‘cuz I’m just summarizing. 

I got thrown out of my local park, what a sight.

I was seen arranging the squirrels by height.

They didn’t like me critter sizing.

There was a young man from Bulgaria.

While in Belize he contracted malaria. 

Don’t worry a spat.

We have a shot for that. 

Size of the jigger will scare ya!