For those who long for Spring,
Above the 45th Parallel it’s a psychological thing.
The calendar says, “It’s here!”
Mother Nature says, “No my dear.”
”Today more snow I’ll bring!”
Author: NDExile
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Put it Right Here
What tattoo do you want and where would you put it?
Tattoos are an expression, create an impression and revel something too.
The tattoo I want is one of a large Australian Kangaroo.
Where is this likeness of said marsupial to appear?
Why no place other than my dearly beloved’s rear.
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Email Inspector
There was a young man from Decker.
In desperate need of a phishing checker.
He went about his way,
With caution every day,
Using Clouseau as an email inspector.
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Left to Right, According to Height
The other day occurred an event most surprising.
I’ll give some details ‘cuz I’m just summarizing.
I got thrown out of my local park, what a sight.
I was seen arranging the squirrels by height.
They didn’t like me critter sizing.
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A Shot for That
There was a young man from Bulgaria.
While in Belize he contracted malaria.
Don’t worry a spat.
We have a shot for that.
Size of the jigger will scare ya!
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What a Croc
There was an animal psychologist from Clio.
In his office was a crocodile from Cairo.
The Doc had to convince his client,
Who remained reclusive and silent.
That he was a hypochondriac in de-Nile.
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For Whom the Bell Tolls
What is one word that describes you?
If I were to choose a word, one that fits me well.
It would be bright and loud, a bit pear-shaped, I think I’d choose ‘bell’.
When left alone and all is calm, you see from me great poise.
But when disturbed and startled, you’ll hear from me great noise.
If you’re bored and your day is slow.
Just reach out, shake me a bit and for you the bell will toll.
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Make Up Your Mind Already
Considering a choice, the man stood fanding.
Frustration and impatience, expanding.
Can you not choose?
Do the facts you confuse?
Oh no, I have a ‘clear’ misunderstanding.
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The Short and the Long of it
What was the best compliment you’ve received?
The best compliment received came in aisle 4.
I was in the canned vegetable section of the grocery store.
An elderly woman, short in stature with steel gray hair, said, “Sir could you help me, do you have a moment to spare?”
She went on, “I am usually self-sufficient doing things myself,
But could you fetch me a can of peas and carrots off the top shelf?”
Said I, “It would be a pleasure and no trouble at all.”
Responding she said, “Thank you so much, you are kind and tall.”
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King of the Road
You’re going on a cross-country trip. Airplane, train, bus, car, or bike?
Crossing this nation one travels far.
I’ll not go by bike, rather by car.
Baggage handling, seat assignments, oh what a pain.
That’s what you get with air, bus or train.
I’ll see the open prairies, I am king of the road.
At the end of my journey I’ll arrive peacefully to my abode.
The Ethereal Scupper 